Lots of thoughts

It has been awhile and I have had lots of those "I should blog that" moments.
I have been thinking a lot about the holidays and how different they are going to be this year. Jim LOVES the holiday. He loves playing football on Thanksgiving and hanging out with family and friends. He LOVES everything about Christmas. The music (which we start listening to in October) and the tree, which he cuts down for me. The decorating, the lights, even santa. And on Christmas morning he is up before any of us. I just love that. So, this week I started listening to Christmas music. I started crying on "I'll be home for Christmas" I am missing my husband as this season starts and just hope that he is able to have a decent Christmas.
Anyway with all this thinking about Christmas I was thinking about what to get the kids. Now I am a big one in getting them things they will really like. This year is hard. Brayden doesn't have one toy that he absoultly loves. He pretends a lot and does crafts and we love books. Those are his things. So, I am thinking some sort of fort or something, and more craft stuff. He has found some train, plane things he thinks is cool so those are ideas as well. Riley well she does what brother does. But she does love her baby. I am thinking a tea set. (Her and I have tea when B is at school) and a shopping cart. I would get her clothes for her baby but she doesn't like to have them in clothes most of the time. Question for you, What do your kids just love doing?
I just got a call from a mom of a kid that Jim coached in high school, he also stayed with us on occasion and we just loved him. Well I guess he has joined the army and is heading off to boot camp and they wanted to invite us to his going away party. We chatted for awhile and I explained to her our situation and that Jim wouldn't be able to make it. Bless her heart she asked if she could pray for us and you know what is so cool? She did right then and there on the phone. It was the sweetest and most sincere prayer. I just love when God blesses me like that. And even prayed for something I didn't mention. Guidance in parenting.
That brings me to having a humbling moment. I am a doer. I tough it up and just deal. I don't spend a lot of time in self pity and as great as that is at times that isn't so good when you need to rely on God. I know this may sound weird but I rely more on God when Jim is away. It helps me remember that people will always fail me and God is always there. Now on to my moment. So, I have always felt like I was a good mommy. I love my kids more than life and love that I am blessed to stay home with them. I don't need a lot of time to myself, I just love being with my kids. But, parenting a four year boy is difficult. They do and say things that are just odd to me. And after a tryiing morning (following a great morning at hearts where we had a reminder of God our provider, I burst into tears and realized that I can't do this. I have to give my kids to God and I need his help in parenting with patience and Love. My greatest desire is that my kids know Christ deeply. So, I picked Brayden up from school and just felt refreshed. I apologized to Brayden for being short and for yelling lately. I have done really well the last couple of days. Thank you Lord for helping me.