Friday, June 27, 2014

Marriage

Lately I have been hearing of people we love and care about calling it quits. Satan is after marriages and it is sad when you talk to the people and hear why. One of our friends said she "had put up with his stuff long enough" Seriously. That doesn't sound like a biblical reason as to why to leave and mess your family up. Especially when he truly wanted it to work. I feel like so many people focus on the negative. Instead of saying man my spouse really loves me by doing ... They say man he never picks up his socks and he never puts his dishes away. My husband works really hard. He is self employed and works in the army reserve. He also takes time to coach our sons sports. But you know what? By him working so hard I am able to stay home with our kids. Work part time and not have to coordinate child care. I have chosen to look at the positive. If he goes golf one day, why not, he works hard and should get to enjoy himself sometimes. So, because I have these beliefs and I enjoy reading and listening to focus on the family. I love when my simple, uncolleged self hears Harvard grads/authors say the exact thing I have been saying. Happy marriages are perfect marriages. They are two flawed people who have CHOSEN to be happy. People have made a choice to believe the best in their spouse. People who have made a commitment to one another and are going to honor that but who are choosing to be happy in that as well. Today in my bible time I was reading in Proverbs 26 and 27 and guess what? Talks about a quarreling wife. Thats right ladies. We have to stop nagging our husbands. In this life does it truly matter if he doesn't fill ALL our needs? We can't have Hollywood expectations. Our husbands are human and maybe if we get off the cycle of nagging and nitpicking maybe our husband will see it and desire to spend more time with us and want to bless us in different ways. Is that a for sure thing? No, but the less we nag and the more we bless I am guessing our home will become more peaceful. I know for a fact when I stopped nagging and started speaking kind and blessing my husband our marriage got better. Am I perfect. NO!! I do get grumpy at time and don't speak kindly to him or the kids. But if you ask him today he will say we have a great marriage. So, start today. Say a kind work. Tell him thanks for what he does do and don't correct him for all the things he isn't doing. Just bless him with that. Do it daily and before you know it you won't notice the socks on the floor and all those things. Just be thankful he is home with you and able to leave the socks on the floor.

1 comment:

Rebecca Sadler said...

I appreciate this post so much! I personally am going through the pain of divorce right now, however, i do believe i am going to marry again somewhere down the road and i currently am absorbing all the help i can get on learning how to be a better wife the second (God willing FINAL time) around.
Life is complex and unfortunately even with years of prayer, counseling, being plugged in and active in an amazing church that fights to keep marriages together and healthy, and both of us trying to make it work in the ways we knew how, the marriage was irreparably broken. I'm so thankful for God's grace and mercy and that he's still on my side, as well as on my husband's side.
Anyway, i just wanted to say thanks for your post. it's very helpful and i loved how you talked about being "uncolleged" - that's me too! true wisdom comes from God and we have the best "Professor" in the universe to teach us! :)